Here are 8 things you shouldn't know about me. If you do then you are a creepy stalker and need to back off (does not apply to Madame2Bar, of course).
1. I have no middle name.
2. I achieved all my life's grand ambitions before I turned 30. They were:
- Get a degree
- Get married
- Have children
- Earn over $50,000 a year
- Own an electric guitar
4. Though I am a Christian, I don't own any brown cardigans.
5. I get migraines from chocolate. The only other person that I know of with this affliction is Madame2Bar.
6. I am training myself to run a marathon (Hard work to start after arm surgery). This is not a grand ambition, more of a "Wouldn't it be cool if I could ..." kind of thing.
7. The best job I ever had was as a swimming teacher.
8. I like my in-laws better than my parents.
3 comments:
I need to have the arm surgery first because of strength training. I am not aiming to run a marathon on my hands.
Your cardiganlessness is risky, my friend, and could have tragic consequences in the future...
St Peter: Welcome to Heaven, 2BarRiff. I see your name is in the Book of Life, so come on... wait a moment. Where's your brown cardigan?
2BarRiff: Er... I never got one.
St Peter: No brown cardigan? How did you expect to call yourself a Christian without a brown cardigan? (peers suspiciously) And are those cargo pants?
2BarRiff: Um... maybe.
St Peter: WHERE ARE YOUR POWDER BLUE POLYESTER SLACKS, SINNER?
2BarRiff: Well, I like the feel of pure cotton...
St Peter: BLASPHEMY!!! CAST HIM INTO THE FIERY COUNTRY ROAD FACTORY OUTLET!!!
So if you truly value your immortal soul, you'll get your brown cardigan, some nice beige vinyl shoes, and maybe a loud rayon shirt from Target for those special occasions.
I'm sort of in a sartorial purgetory at the moment - not cool enough for Hillsong, too cool for Anglican.
So I just sit here atoning for acid wash jeans and Primus T-shirts until some family member prays for my soul.
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